Facing adversity: Amulek and his testimony

So here's the next installment of my thoughts on adversity. I decided to follow up on Amulek becaues I wanted to know how he was able to rely on the Savior in order to gain love and forgiveness. I think those Christ-like characteristics were what helped him move on with his life after his trials. I want to be like that, too.
As I've described previously, Amulek had to face some really difficult trials. Words fail when I try to describe just how hard it must have been. I want to figure out how he managed and how I can be as strong as he was. So today I'm going to try to focus more on what Amulek did to prepare and how he handled himself once he got into the situations he had to face.
First, he listened to the prophet Alma and gained a firm testimony that what Alma taught was true. In Alma 10:10, he says “I know that the things whereof he [Alma] hath testified are true; for behold I say unto you, that as the Lord liveth, even so has he sent his angel to make these things manifest unto me.” Now, not everyone who receives a visit from an angel gains a testimony like this. Look at Laman and Lemuel back in 1 Nephi 3:31. Immediately after the angel left, “Laman and Lemuel again began to murmur, saying: How is it possible that the Lord will deliver Laban into our hands?” So Amulek obviously had to have faith and put forth an effort to gain his testimony. It didn't come automatically. Even though he would have felt the influence of the Holy Ghost when the angel appeared and when Alma first taught him, he had to act on that experience. So Amulek had a firm testimony before the trials came. This is important. Once trials arrive, it's much harder to build a strong testimony, because it's being shaken as you try to establish it.
An extremely important part of Amulek's testimony was his knowledge of the atonement and the resurrection. I know I've already talked about this in a previous note, but it is crucial to our understanding of Amulek's testimony, and to gaining our own testimonies, for that matter. Just as we have to do, I'm sure Amulek relied greatly on his knowledge of the resurrection, considering the nature of the trial he faced. He testified, “Now, there is a death which is called a temporal death; and the death of Christ shall loose the bands of this temporal death, that all shall be raised form this temporal death. The spirit and the body shall be reunited again in its perfect form, both limb and joint shall be restored to its proper frame, even as we now are at this time; and we shall be brought to stand before God . . . Now, this restoration shall come to all, both old and young, both bond and free, both male and female, both the wicked and the righteous; and even there shall not so much as a hair of their heads be lost; but every thing shall be restored to its perfect frame” (Alma 11:42-44). I quote so much of this passage because I believe it was important to Amulek as he dealt with his grief after witnessing such great suffering as he did. He had to watch hundreds of innocent women and children die, burned to death. Amulek did feel their suffering, deeply. I'm sure the grieving process he went through lasted a long time. But he had his testimony, already established. He knew that because of Christ's atonement and resurrection, every human being would live again. Death was not the end of life. If it were, such an awful event would have no remedy. It would be unendurable. But Amulek could have hope because Christ not only suffered for all of these people, but He also made it possible for them to live again, without any pain. This seem so important to me because Christ's atonement is what gives us hope, what makes it possible to overcome challenges in this life. As I said, if we had nothing to look forward to after death, life would lose its meaning. But Christ did come, He did atone for our sins, He died for us, and He rose again from the grave. In Amulek's time, Christ had not yet come, but Amulek had hope for the future and he knew that Christ's atonement was infinite, covering everything that ever had or ever would happen.
Christ's motive for the Atonement was love. Pure, unconditional love for the children of God. Remember the Sermon on the Mount, where Christ taught a higher law. He was teaching us to forgive, to rise above natural reactions (think 'natural man' and Mosiah 3) “Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you and persecute you” (Matt. 5:43-44). Love, forgive, turn the other cheek. The golden rule. As much as that goes against our natural instincts, it is imperative that we have this kind of love. It is an eternal principle, which applied in Christ's day, in Amulek's day, and in our day. So Amulek eventually had to love his enemies as Christ did. He had to forgive them. The ability to forgive is often only available to us through the Atonement, through the gift of charity, or the pure love of Christ. I think Amulek must have spent many hours in prayer, trying to gain the gift of charity (see Moroni 7, a wonderful discourse on charity and how to gain it. Also 1 Corinthians 13).
The final point I want to make is that Amulek kept himself worthy to have the Holy Ghost with him. Remember how he was able to know when the lawyers were trying to trick him, back in chapter 10? That's a gift of the Spirit. The Holy Ghost also would have helped him remember his testimony so that he could share it with the people he was teaching. It helped him know what to say. (See D&C 100:6). The Spirit will testify to us of the Savior's existence, including His love for us. Through the Spirit, we can know the truth of all things (Moroni 10:3-5). It is through the Spirit that we can come to know God and His Son Jesus Christ (see D&C 20:26-27). So it's another important aspect of Amulek's example to us.
I believe that Amulek was a great example of spiritual strength. I think he must have been very close to the Savior, as we all must become. I want to follow his example and gain more love for others, more patience and strength to be able to forgive.

Serendipity

So I watched the movie Serendipity once. I don't recommend it; I dislike the lesson that everything will work out perfectly, even when you deliberately do something to would logically prevent a desired outcome. Anyway, the movie came up because I was thinking about serendipity itself. You know, happy coincidences and such. Like the other night at work I was emptying recycling bins as usual. I had my cart sitting outside the room, and I left the lid of the bin leaning against the wall while I went to empty the bin itself into my cart. And as I was walking back, someone was leaving the room and knocked the lid over. He kindly picked it up, and as he did so, I noticed he was an acquaintance from freshman year. Now, I've seen him around campus over the last semester or so, but had been hesitant to say hi, since I didn't know him very well. And last night wasn't any different, except that there he was, just a foot away from me. So as I walked back out to my cart, I said, "Hey, you're ____, right?" And it was him. I told him my name and where I knew him from and we chatted for a minute. And it was good to make a new friend, or at least to renew an acquaintance.

Other serendipitous events:

Running into a friend when you needed someone to talk to, and it turns out they've had an experience that helps encourage you in whatever it is you're going through.

Finding a really good book by chance, just by browsing the library shelves.

Meeting a professor who inspires you to learn more, and who is willing to help you along the way.

Being in the right place at the right time to learn something new, or to figure out what you're going to do with your life.

Finding a great view of the sunset.

I think serendipitous events are most likely to occur when we're happily going about our daily lives and doing what we need to do. We can't expect serendipity to pick us up and put us where we need to go if we're headed in the wrong direction. But when we are going the right way, we'll find wonderful little moments of serendipity that make life surprisingly enjoyable. We just have to pay attention.

p.s. Another good name for serendipity is something that David Bednar called "tender mercies." See this link for his talk on the subject: http://lds.org/general-conference/2005/04/the-tender-mercies-of-the-lord?lang=eng

Facing adversity: Amulek's story

Amulek is one of my favorite characters from the Book of Mormon. He endures really awful trials and comes out stronger than he was before. He was only able to do that because of his faith in God and his love for the Savior and for others. His example is an inspiration to me.

We first meet Amulek in Alma 8:19-32. We learn that he is a Nephite, who has enough faith to trust the angel who told him to invite Alma home for dinner. He lets Alma, a prophet of God, stay long enough to rest and recover from a very difficult journey. In verse 22, we read that Alma “blessed Amulek and his house,” which implies that Amulek had a family, but there are no further details about his wife or about how many children they might have had. (Later, in Alma 10:11, Amulek says that his household includes women and children.) At any rate, Alma stays for “many days with Amulek before he began to preach unto the people” (Alma 8:27). In that time, I imagine that Amulek had the opportunity to learn a great deal about the gospel and to gain a firm testimony, because in verse 29, we read that the Lord commanded Alma to take Amulek along as his companion when he left to teach the people of Ammonihah. This was not an easy task they were undertaking. Alma had already been kicked out of the city once. Nonetheless, both of these men went forth and “were filled with the Holy Ghost” (Alma 8:30).

I would compare this first part of the story to the missionary training center. Before missionaries set off into the world, they spend a time in the MTC learning how to be good missionaries and preparing to teach. When they leave, they are prepared to do what they have to do and they are filled with the Holy Ghost. Amulek's experience is a little different from that of most new missionaries. He got to visit personally with the prophet of God in that time, and before that, he got a visit from an angel. But this period of time was, for him, a time of preparation, when he could build his own spiritual strength before setting off to teach what was a very wicked and hard-hearted people. His faith and obedience are inspiring, and when Amulek starts teaching, we see how strong his testimony and his knowledge of the gospel have grown.

In Alma 10, Amulek tells us that he is a “man of no small reputation” but that he has never before taken the time to listen to the Spirit and to humble himself before God. Basically, he tells of his conversion story, of the way that the angel appeared to him and sent him to meet Alma. He bears his testimony that Alma is a holy man and that what Alma has taught is true, becoming a second witness for those who hear him (see Alma 10:5-11).

Amulek's first test comes from the lawyers of the city Ammonihah, who want to trick him into contradicting himself. He overcomes this test fairly easily, though I imagine he was at least a little nervous about all these people whose sole purpose at that point was to bring him down. Still, he was able to rely on the Lord. Through the Holy Spirit, Amulek was able to perceive their thoughts, as we read in verse 17 of Alma 10. Thus, instead of falling for the trap, he calls the lawyers to repentance. That of course made them more angry, and the people accused him of reviling against their law, or of making fun of it. Amulek's response to that is this: “I have spoken in favor of your law, to your condemnation” (Alma 10:26).

Next, a lawyer named Zeezrom tries to bribe Amulek and fails. Interestingly enough, Zeezrom starts out trying to trick Amulek and ends up asking sincere questions in an attempt to learn more (see Alma 11 for this story). In Alma 12, Alma starts teaching again, following up on what Amulek has said. Then in chapter 14 comes the greatest challenge that Amulek has yet had to face. The majority of the people are angry with these two faithful missionaries and want to destroy them. Instead of killing them, though, they tie them up and take them before the judges. They hold a trial in which many people testify against them. One of their few defenders is Zeezrom, who has realized his own error and is astonished at the wickedness of the others. They cast him out, along with “all those who believed in the words which had been spoken by Alma and Amulek” (Alma 14:7). In verse 8 we learn that only the men who had believed were cast out. The women and children they were forced to leave behind were gathered together and cast into a fire and burned to death. And Alma and Amulek, still bound, were forced to watch.

In Alma 8:31, we read something about the power the Lord gives His servants when they are acting in His name. “And they had power given unto them, insomuch that they could not be confined in dungeons; neither was it possible that any man could slay them; nevertheless they did not exercise their power until they were bound in bands and cast into prison. Now, this was done that the Lord might show forth his power in them.” I'm sure Alma taught Amulek at least a little about the power that they had access to, because when Amulek sees what is happening to the innocent women and children who believed on their words, he turns to Alma in agony, saying “How can we witness this awful scene? Therefore let us stretch forth our hands, and exercise the power of God which is in us, and save them from the flames” (Alma 14:10). He had faith. He knew that God could save His children from this horrible death.

However, sometimes bad things happen to good people who don't deserve them. God loves His children, but there are times when He allows those kinds of things to happen in order to bring about His purposes. In this case, Alma explained to Amulek that God was allowing the people of Ammonihah to do “this thing unto them, according to the hardness of their hearts, that the judgments which he shall exercise upon them in his wrath may be just; and the blood of the innocent shall stand as a witness against them” (Alma 14:11).

Even for Alma, this must have been hard to accept. He was a prophet of God and had a great love for God's children. Watching this amount of suffering must have been soul-wrenching. I cannot even imagine how much pain Amulek must have suffered, however. He was from Ammonihah. He knew the people. Perhaps the women and children who were burned even included his own wife and children, perhaps his sister or his cousin... After all, once they finally left Ammonihah, Amulek went with Alma to his house, seemingly because he had no one else to stay with (see Alma 15:18). And we never read about Amulek's children later on in the Book of Mormon. He says to Alma, “perhaps they will burn us also” (14:11). When suffering that much pain, it is hard to find the desire to go on living. It is hard to find meaning in life. Still, in verse 12, Alma tells him that their work is not yet finished and they will live.

Somehow, Amulek accepts this trial and endures it well. He must have drawn on his faith in God a great deal. He must have had to pray and fast and study the scriptures. He must have relied on what Alma had taught him about the Atonement of Jesus Christ. In order to move on with his life, Amulek needed a testimony of Christ's atonement. He had to know that Christ paid for all the sin and suffering that he had both witnessed and experienced. He must have gained a testimony of the atonement when he went through the repentance process, but now he was forced to rely on the Atonement for more than just his own sins. He had to develop charity to be able to forgive the people that had done such an awful thing and forced him to watch. I can't imagine how much pain he experienced and had to overcome. What I do know is that Christ does understand Amulek's suffering because in his atonement, Christ felt and paid for everything. Everything. Every pain, every weakness, every sin. He paid for the sins of those who burned the innocent people, and for the pain of every individual who suffered that awful death, and the pain Alma and Amulek felt when they watched it, and the pain of the husbands and fathers who learned about it later.

Amulek was able to move on with his life. He returned with Alma to his home in Zarahemla, and later went on to serve other missions. He did not lose his testimony. In fact, after seeing what he saw, he became stronger, because he relied on the Lord. Like Amulek, there are times when we have to rely on the atonement and on our faith in Jesus Christ if we want to move on with our lives and keep our sanity. We just can't do it alone. I know that Amulek, in order to endure well, must have turned to the things he knew about God's plan for His children. Amulek knew that God loved His children, including those who went through trials. He knew that God was there to support him in his trials and help him become stronger. He had a testimony.

We can also gain a testimony like that. We do that by reading stories like this and learning from them. Amulek didn't have an easy time of it. His trials didn't go away just because he had faith. Neither will ours. Sometimes life is not fair, and the actions of other people, intentionally or not, will cause us pain at some point. When that happens, we have to rely on our faith in Christ. We must remember that Christ loved all of God's children. He atoned for each of us individually. So even though we experience unfairness and deep suffering, He has already paid for it. It doesn't change the actual events, but our faith and reliance on Christ can change our reaction to those events. We can learn to love and forgive as Christ did, as Amulek did by relying on Christ. Every one of us has that opportunity. We must remember how much Christ loves us, and how much we have needed His love and His capacity for forgiveness. Through the power of His atonement, Christ will bless us with the ability to love and forgive as well, if we let Him. Just as Amulek did, we can endure our trials well, then move on with our lives by relying on the strength that Christ lends us. As we do so, we will become stronger.

Favorite characters

I am extremely fond of books, especially when I can relate to the characters. I suppose that's why human beings create art; it's meant to reflect life, and human nature. It's natural when reading to see ourselves reflected in the characters of a book. And when we read and think about the characters, we come to understand ourselves better. Thus, I thought I'd make a list of the characters I like. They are in no particular order and I'll probably have to add to it later, as I think of more.

Meg, from A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle. Like me, she reads books and thinks and has an overactive imagination. And she is brave.

Lucian, from The Arkadians by Lloyd Alexander. He's a storyteller, who loves listening to stories and learning about the world around him. He tends to overestimate his own abilities sometimes, but he makes it through with help from his friends.

Morwen, from Calling on Dragons by Patricia Wrede. She's a witch, a highly intelligent individual who has about nine cats, with whom she converses on a regular basis.

Edmund, from The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis. I love Edmund because he changes. He knows he made a huge mistake and he does his best to fix it.

Anne Beddingfield, from The Man in the Brown Suit by Agatha Christie. She's an extremely adventurous young woman who travels to South Africa by herself, uncovering mysteries along the way.

Vin, from Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson. She's brave, but has a hard time trusting people. She is willing to fight for those she loves.

Elizabeth Bennet. from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. Yes, I know it's somewhat cliche, but there's a reason the book is so popular. It's really good! And Elizabeth is a very strong character, witty, bold, slightly imprudent. She has to learn to recognize and admit when she makes a mistake, letting go of her pride.

Kim, from Mairelon the Magician and Magician's Ward by Patricia Wrede. She is an orphan who is used to living on her own, but she winds up working with a magician named Mairelon. She's quite resourceful.

The new year

Today is only the second day of this new year. And it does feel new. It's a chance to start over, in a way. It's like opening up a brand new journal and writing in it. As we start the new year, we can decide who we want to be this year and create new memories. But it's also a time to reflect on the past. I don't believe in dwelling on the past or on dreaming too much of the future. Rather, we should learn from the past, plan for the future and live fully in the present. Being in the world is a wonderful experience, and I think we should take full advantage of it. That is what I want to do this year. I want to experience life, to learn from my experiences, and to be the best person I can be. I don't know what this year will bring yet, but I'm excited for it!

Things that make me smile :)

birthday parties

friends

balloons

blue skies

trains

pictures

love notes

clocks (melting ones, or broken ones)

ice cream cones (with ice cream inside)

mint chocolate chip

Pixar movies

good books

flying

fairy tale endings

life, the universe and everything

architecture

starry nights

campfires

irises

s'mores

hugs

waffles

Greek yogurt

cantaloupe

sweaters

old movies

poetry

walks (on the beach, up to campus, through a foreign city at night, etc)

making up words

good conversations

Christmas songs

A good mystery, read while curled up in a comfortable chair on a rainy day.

comfortable couches

stuffed animals

foreign films

cooking with friends (and eating, too!)

art museums

thinking, musing, pondering or otherwise wondering about life

dancing (salsa or country)

Spanish poetry

fall weather

teachers

dreams

lunch

colorful leaves

spiral staircases

Spiral Jetty

roses

trying new things

talking to people

making lists in an attempt to describe myself.

Those lists are probably unavoidably incomplete, but I try anyway. I made another of these last year in July, so I thought it would be interesting to do it again and compare the two. Maybe I'll do it again next year... Here's last years' version:

Singing in the rain.

Cooking with friends.

Dancing.

Pizza.

Love notes.

Letters.

People who genuinely care, and who take time to show it.

Going for walks.

Swimming.

Picnics.

Canyons.

Blue skies, with not too many clouds.

Playing soccer with friends, in Spain or wherever.

Going for walks.

Fireworks on the fourth of July.

The way nighttime smells.

Jumping into/through pool toys...

Writing and expressing myself with words (thus this note).

Hearing songs I like come on the radio.

Lying on the floor with my roommates and talking about whatever we want to.

Talking about books, movies and plays with other people who like talking about books, movies and plays.

Singing out loud, when I'm with people who won't mind.

Museums.

Seeing friends I've been missing for a while.

Swing music.

Finding really cool parks.

Spontaneous dance parties.

Liar's dice.

Hugs.

Fiddle and folk music.

Hearing stories.

Speaking Spanish with people.

Baking cupcakes.

Sharing food.

Weddings!

Laughing.

Waterfalls.

Taking pictures and making memories.

Making people smile.

Musings on life and poetry.

It's been a while since I've written. As you can tell if you look at the dates of all of the posts on here. But I feel like writing again.

It's about midway through my second-to-last semester as an undergrad. It's also my last Wednesday as a 2o-year-old. Life is still good. It's just busy enough to help me avoid boredom, and I am enjoying my classes. I've been reading lots of Spanish poetry, which means I've been thinking about life, love, memories, dreams and philosophy. I enjoy thinking and making connections between all the things I learn. Poetry is a fun way to express thoughts. I've tried writing poetry a few times... I find it easier to write in free verse, without worrying about rhyme schemes or meter. For me, that's a better way to describe life. Life doesn't always fit in a specific meter. It's mixed-up and crazy and complicated. Putting it down in words is hard enough without worrying about making it rhyme. That's not to say that I don't believe there's meaning to life. On the contrary. I believe life is full of meaning. God is real. He loves all of His children, and He does have a plan for us. That's where the meaning of life is and that's why I can say that life is good.